Living the Real

Are you a visionary or a victim?

• Matt Boettger • Episode 15

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Matt Boettger:

Are you living the most real life possible? I ask myself this question all the time. Most of the time, the answer is I just don't know, but sometimes the answer is definitely not. This is why I had his podcast.

I'm Matt Boettger and welcome

Matt Boettger:

to the show. Two small things. If you get a chance, please leave a review like on Apple podcasts and also check out my website, live in the real.com where I offer lots of resources on how to live the most real life possible now on with the show. All right, so welcome to episode 15. Oh, living the real, and I have a huge apology to make, and that is I haven't had an episode in over a month. There's a reason for that. I want to talk to you about that today right now, but I wanna start with the title of this episodes podcast, and that is, are you a visionary or a victim that might sound like maybe a false dichotomy, but look, give me a few minutes to kind of just unfolded. So it helps to make sense because here's the reason why I've been gone for like, I think five weeks or six weeks off this podcast, because I had to give it up. Temporarily, but I've been working on a beta coaching program. This is something that I have been working on for a year, has been on my heart and mind, and finally got the traction to really start leveraging, putting things together, getting some clients to be onboarded and practice it. And then begin to develop it. And I'm excited to share some of the stuff that I've been developing with you today and encourage you to check it out. So before we even get to the end, yes. At the end, we're going to talk about my beta coaching program. And if you're interested, you can go to living the real.com/coaching and get in on it while it's cheap. This is going be cheapest. It will ever be because once I am done, which should be in about the next month or so, begin to, to move up the price to its regular. Cost, but it right now is a four week coaching session. You're gonna hear more about it, but what I want to start with is this question. Are you a victim or a visionary? And where does this come from? I've learned this in my own life over and over and over and over that. Another way to ask the questions. Do you have a clear and concrete vision for your life? Oftentimes, we just let this go for businesses, small businesses or people who are in corporations and they have a vision plan. They have an offsite and they have a whole day dedicated to it and that's it. Right. But personally, and I work with clients to develop visions, right? Business, small businesses for their business, but rarely. Rarely do we create a vision for our own personal life? And this is the most exciting thing for me, because this is where my heart's at helping individual people leverage their life so that life no longer happens to them, but they happen to life. I want you to have that in the most critical component on this is happy to vision for your life, because if you don't have a vision, a concrete one, a clear, not this kind of, yeah. I've got a kind of an idea of what I want my life to be. Right. That's not going to cut it. That's going to make you drift through life and you're going to have life happen to you. And you're going to have your life be full of regrets and maybe even resentments. And I don't want that for you. And I don't want that for me. And so I'm going to share something about the importance of having a vision and what that means for your life right now, because if you don't, then you're playing the victim card. So how is that? Does it sound dramatic? It probably does, but it is well, here's, here's a couple of ways by which if you don't have a concrete vision in your life right now, you are a victim. Number one, the one that probably is the closest to people's minds and hearts right now, if you're listening to this right. Is the idea of drifting through life. If you don't have a vision, you don't have a North star that's concrete, that's specific. Then you are drifting through life, which means life happens to you. And what's the definition of a victim. It's wide. It's all this stuff happened to me, right? You're a victim of life, external, external locus of control, right? This idea that the world happens to you when you just don't have a control. There's nothing you can do. You're just a victim, right? If you don't have a vision, then you're a victim in that, right. That's probably the most obvious, but there is a more subtle way by which we are victims and that is opportunistic people. Now, if you don't have a vision, you may be still successful. You still might be doing well for yourself or maybe not. And the reason why is because you don't have a vision and you happen to be opportunistic, which is better than playing the victim card by far. But it's not fulfilling and living. The real is all about living the most fulfilling life possible. So means you gotta have a vision because if you are opportunistic well, then again, you react to life, right? There's an opportunity we should take it right. Or another option. We should take it. And so you find yourself with these kinds of short term wins and maybe even sustainable for years to come. But there's a problem with this. You, you have success, but it comes to the cost of your soul. Or the soul of your business, because once you chase what opportunity for another, you begin to find yourself in another way, drifting through life, through successes. And in the end, what you have is maybe a pile of money or some money, but not anything that was fulfilling that reached the depths of your soul and made you successful. That's the point? It's both and not either, or. If you don't have a vision, this is what you're going to end up being either a, a victim, a curmudgeon and old man woman who was just bitter about life, because life happened to you your entire life, or you're simply opportunistic and you chase one opportunity to next. Sometimes not getting it. And so you find another one and then you drift in another way through opportunity upon opportunity, which is better than a victim, but you're find yourself completely utterly unfulfilled in the end and have a decent amount of regrets by the way. So the best and most powerful way is to be a visionary. For yourself and not be a victim. This means you happen to life because now you have a compass, you have a direction that you want to go, that you desire to go. And now you are not a victim. You're not reactive, right? As the opportunistic person is the reacting towards life, but you're now proactive. You are happening to life and that's the most important thing you can give to the world. Whoever you are listening, you were unrepeatable. You have complete and utter unrepeatable value. And while you're here on this earth is to provide that unrepeatable value to the world, which means you need to happen to the world and not have the world happen to you. Now I get it all these, these trite, right? Cliche things. Yes. The world does happen to us on occasion every once in a while. There's this weird thing called a pandemic that happens. And then it shuts us down. Right. But that is the exception to the rule, right? That's what I want for you to be, of course, things happen, whereas life becomes overwhelming and then you have to pivot for a temporary period of time. But even that with your vision is still under your control. You were deciding to pivot. To change directions for X amount of time to get things under control and then reapply your vision to your life, or even a better way, which I tell some of my clients, you don't let go of the vision. You don't press pause. You just reduced the amount of energy you expend on it. During those, those tough times. Normally you're cranking out 25% of your week or 30% of your week or whatever, a 10% of your week, right towards this vision. But in these difficult times, you give 1%. It's still a top of mind. It's still there like a burning coal and you keep it burning so that when you're ready and you're ready to put the dump, the other coals on top of it, it can get a flame as well. So I want to talk to you about, about this idea of a vision. Now, for me in part of my coaching program, if you don't know already living the reels base off three major criteria is three frameworks, and that is the first one margin. This idea of expanding the space in your life. In such a way by which then you can then reallocate real energy to your life to something great. We know what it's like to have a little margin or life, little space, whether it's time, we're running from one thing to the next, right. And then constantly being frantic and we're exhausted in the day or emotional margin. We're constantly in our. Feeling these down and negative thoughts to the point where we have no energy left. This constant margin is the most important part of my living. The real framework that you do not begin to address this. You can have all the time in the world, but if you, but if you don't have the energy, you just can't get going. So you need to have the energy and the time available. So margin is the foundation stone of the living, the real coaching program, understanding what are those areas by which we are being sucked dry. Some of these things I talk about and I use within my coaching program, we talk about the older life and building a foundation by which we have a strong anchor it's like that, that scriptural passage about building upon sand. Or upon dry ground that we don't want to build upon sand by which then when life happens to us and those rare occurrences or whatever it may be that we just sink. We can't deal with it. We want to be built on a solid foundation so we can handle and weather the storms greatly in our own life. And in the margin, we talked about the types of margin, the core margin, the emotional margin in our life, and those kinds of things, as well as the practical margin in our life, there is the finances, the things that we do, the finances, the environment around us, it might be too cluttered. That just makes us feel as if we're suffocating. These are all important aspects to consider. Right away up front because we don't have the energy we'll then we're going nowhere. Right. We don't have anything. We're we're we're we, we can't even get to the starting line. I use a mindset pyramid was in my coaching program to help unfold our deep experience of our life for our past. And see about how those experiences his childhood as an a young adult has really shaped our beliefs and our emotions and these things that have contributed to the results we don't want in our life and suck the margin out of us. So that's indispensable. And my second was momentum. Then now we need a bit, build a plan for a life and move forward. And this is what I wanna talk about today in this idea of a vision funnel. It's something that I use in my coaching program as a powerful agent of change. And here's why, because oftentimes what I hear about visions is problematic. The first one is when I do a vision, it isn't to being fuzzy and abstract, right. It doesn't really go anywhere. It's just emotion. It's pointless. Right? My vision funnel specifically addresses that because I know what it's like to have a vision I've done years ago, and it's just abstract, fuzzy and goes nowhere. And I want it to have teeth have specificity that it actually, doesn't only evoke emotion, but it evokes direction in your life. And my vision funnel does exactly that. And I walk you through it step by step. The second problem is that the idea of shelf life syndrome, I call it as idea that you get a vision and Hey, it's good. It's awesome. But then it sits on your shelf or it sits on some random folder. In your, on your Mac, on your PC. And the last time you touched that folder was 2008. It does nothing. It's just a merit badge for you, but doesn't have anything to do with your life. The third one is that it's not integrated into your daily life, but yeah, I got a vision. I look at it actually regularly. I see it, but I don't really have a way by which I specifically use it. In a way to move my daily life forward. All three of these things are directly addressed and fixed through my vision funnel that you have a powerful vision of way of life that is specific and clear that it's, it is actively in front of you actually every day in my 3m framework, though, margin momentum and maintenance. We'll talk about in just a second, as well as, as deeply integrate into your daily life. So that at least in the bare minimum, You are making a 1% move towards your vision every day in some small way. So this is the big problems. The vision funnels solves all of this,

and

Matt Boettger:

I wouldn't encourage you right now to, at this point in time in December, the new year is about to happen. It's almost 2021. Thank God and make this 2021 the best year of your life, the most fulfilling year of your life. And it will not happen. I guarantee you woman happened in the context of the same stuff you might be doing right now. You're going to drift. You're going to be reactive opportunistic, but what you will not be is a visionary.

I

Matt Boettger:

want to help you be that. And right now, this is the best time by which you can get on right now and be my beta coaching plan to help me right. Develop it further at a strongly discounted price. And benefit. You greatly prepare you to have an enormously successful January in 2021. And if you don't jump on board going live in the real.com/coaching. Right now, I'm offering a free 30 minute just consultation. We hang for 30 minutes. Talk about what's going on in your life and how I could be a resource for you. If it doesn't work, no big deal. There's no pressure. And if it works out, that's great. But now it's the time to jump on board. I talked about margin and we talk about it in the coaching framework, I talked about momentum and the vision plan, and there's other things in the context of my plan, that's going to help you tremendously leverage your vision funnel, turn it into a profound plan and you get the accountability with me to ensure that it launches well. And hopefully you will have continued accountability along the way. And then I last M of the 3m framework for living the real is maintenance, margin, momentum, maintenance, and that's where the systems come into place. I'm an advocate that systems do save. They save, I had a business client one time constantly telling me how over and over and over that they just got the wrong people over and over, over. And that's why their business was just not being that successful. Year after year after year, they have high turnover. It's not the right people and we've got to get the right people. There's always a large partial truth in that statement, but there is a bigger truth to be held. And that is the systems that they had in place were insufficient for their success in that was dragging them down more than the dysfunctional people. How do I know this? I think just intuitively look at the skyscrapers around you in big cities, New York, city, Chicago, and you look of how many people it took to develop and construct architect build that infrastructure. Thousands, thousands upon thousands of individuals down to the there's, the architects to the laborers everywhere. Do you think now? There's no doubt in my mind that you need to have precision when you develop and build a skyscraper, right? an inch off could be absolutely destructive, right? To a skyscraper. Precision is absolutely indispensable yet thousands and thousands of workers come together to put this whole skyscraper together, almost flawlessly. And are you going to tell me that everything single individual worker in there was the most functional, highly competent individual you could possibly ever imagine? Of course not. Of course I guarantee you, there were dozens. If not hundreds of dysfunctional workers yet the plans still came out perfectly. Well, why? Because system's safe. When you're putting on a skyscraper, you've got to have the right systems in place and the accountability to make sure that gets done. And so for your own life, the maintenance last pillar is all about ensuring that you have the right systems in place in your life, technologically, and just habitually to be able to not only crush your plan, but keep the rest of your life under control as well in a way that's fulfilling and not stressful. And so there we are in the third pillar of the framework discussing where you at in your framework, in your systems and helping you incorporate this awesome plan, which is a 12 week plan in to your daily life with strong accountability. So if you are interested, I encourage you. It is a great, an awesome opportunity. Right now to get on it before the new year begins every week, you get a class online by which you watch. And then on top of that, you get weekly coaching sessions with me one week of a class and margin two weeks on momentum and one week on maintenance, which really should be two to three weeks, which I might change down the road relatively soon. Classes on each one of those. And then of course, weekly coaching sessions to help you integrate it deeply into your own life. So that by the time we're done, we're set. We're good. We have a plan in action and is beginning to work. So I encourage you check out living the real.com/coaching and begin to live as a visionary and not just a victim. And if you don't do that more than anything, I encourage you, please, please, please use this month in December to cultivate a vision for your life. Make 2021 count 2020 sucked. It was tough and it was hard for me at times to live my own paradigm of living the real and seeing where is a gift in this? What does this make possible for me? Yet, I dove deep into those hard questions. And every time I came out with an answer and it lifted my heart and my soul and having a vision alongside me to keep me going is what kept me optimistic, joyful, and focused this 2020. And I hope that is for you in 2021. Okay. I'm hopefully back in the seat of air in these podcasts while regularly. I hope you have a wonderful week. I will see you next episode. Again, check out living the real.com/coaching. Get a free 30 minutes with me of how I can help. Move your life forward and have you have the best 2021 the most fulfilling year of your life. Take care. Bye bye. Thank you for listening to this episode of living the real. If you want to check out more information, go to living the real.com and sign up for my newsletter. If you want to support this podcast, you do that at patrion.com/ltr as well as one-time payments at Venmo and PayPal in the show notes. See you all next episode. Take care. Bye-bye.